How social media can cause anxiety in kids

Though its name suggests human connection, social media use has led to concerning mental health issues among children in recent years. Research shows that kids who spend more time on social media have higher rates of feelings of anxiety or depression.

What is it about social media that is detrimental to our children’s health, as well as our own?

Firstly, social media offers a never-ending collection of people with whom we can compare ourselves, says Dr. Melissa Hord, PhD, a child and adolescent psychologist at Riley Children’s Health. The human brain is programmed to make comparisons about its surroundings to stay alive, but social media now allows us to compare ourselves to so many other people that it can trigger anxiety and body image issues.

Social media also offers quick, easy and passive form of entertainment, which can negatively affect the developing child brain. This is especially true when scrolling a social media app replaces a more productive and brain-friendly activity, like playing with Legos or drawing.

“Anything with a screen and lights is very attractive to kids. They get really drawn into it because it’s meant to do be enticing. Unfortunately, the kids most attracted to social media are the ones who get hurt the most by it,” Dr. Hord said. “Kids with ADHD, anxiety, depression or behavior problems see those issues worsen through social media use. Kids with ADHD are drawn to it because their brains are already moving so fast, it’s hard for them to sit and read or sit and do something that’s a better brain exercise. Those activities don’t draw their attention as much as social media.”

As they grow, children develop social and emotional abilities. They use these skills to create and keep meaningful relationships and express and manage their emotions. Kids learn these social-emotional skills by playing and socializing with others. When kids are spending this important time on social media apps instead of interacting with their peers, they’re not developing these important life skills.

The effects of social media on the brain

When we experience something pleasurable, our brain releases a chemical called dopamine that makes our bodies want to continue that action. This is why some of us keep eating chocolate or listening to our favorite music. On social media, we may get a dopamine release from watching a funny cat video or reading a joke meme. Our brains want to continue this dopamine feedback loop, which can lead to mindless scrolling on Instagram or Facebook.

This is particularly challenging for children. By age 10, kids’ brains begin to seek social rewards, acceptance and approval among their social circles, according to the American Psychological Association. A compliment or “like” on social media can begin the reward system, and children are uniquely vulnerable to it. The compliments or criticism they receive online are also more public and permanent than those delivered in person, which can cause lasting feelings of depression and anxiety.

How to limit negative effects of social media

There are several strategies parents can implement to reduce the negative effects of social media and encourage healthy screen time habits with your kids.

Limit screen time

In general, it’s important to limit children’s screen time for mental health and brain development. While the American Academy of Pediatrics suggests specific screen time limits for very young children, there’s more to consider when deciding limits for school-age and teenage kids. A good starting point is a maximum of two hours a day, including school-time screen use. Talk with your family to decide a good limit for you.

Consider whether your kids are ready for social media

While prohibiting your child from visiting social media sites may create feelings of “FOMO” (fear of missing out), experts suggest waiting until a child’s brain is more developed before allowing them to join social media. Every child is different, but this might occur after the age of 13. As you think about whether your child is ready, consider:

• Your child’s maturity level
• How much they feel influenced by others
• How open they are with you about day-to-day interactions
• If they have demonstrated responsibility
• Their willingness to allow you to check in on what they are doing

Curate a healthy feed

If you allow your children to access social media platforms, talk with them about what they’re watching and whom they’re following. By creating a collection of positive, age-appropriate and healthy influences, you can help your child avoid some of the more negative and critical aspects of social media sites. It’s also important for kids to understand that social media algorithms can lead them down a path toward inappropriate content.

“So many kids I work with will end up on an inappropriate website through YouTube because it’s not controlled,” Dr. Hord said. “It’s hard to make sure your kids aren’t looking at things they shouldn’t’ be on there, and a lot of kids end up learning things parents wish they hadn’t.”

To head this off, be aware of what your children are watching and consuming online.

Ensure your child is getting enough sleep

When children stay up late at night, scrolling social media, the lack of sleep impacts their ability to pay attention in class or feel well throughout the day. Dr. Hord frequently sees children who are not getting enough rest, which can worsen feelings of anxiety and depression. Parents can avoid this by creating rules about stopping device use at a certain time every night to eliminate the quick-fix entertainment of scrolling.

Focus on enjoyable activities and hobbies

Make sure your child has non-screen hobbies or activities that bring joy into their lives. While social media can offer unique opportunities to meet and connect with others or learn something new, the interactions are not as fulfilling as real-world ones, especially for the growing brain. Do some self-reflection (for yourself and with your kids) to identify what makes you feel happy and engaged in life, whether it’s sports, crafts or enjoying the outdoors, and be sure to prioritize to those activities.

Model good behavior as parents

Kids often tell Dr. Hord that their parents are on their phones all the time, and it’s a habit that children want to emulate. By setting limits for yourself and following house rules about screen time and social media use, you can help your child navigate healthy social media use.

“Our kids are going to model after us. Model for them being engaged with life, doing things with friends, having good self-care and putting your phone down at certain times, like at the dinner table,” Dr. Hord said. “Showing your kids that this is important to you will help them learn to value these habits.”